Jesus Has Asses!

A recent commenter was destined for that Big Bin Where The Bozos Go, but my colleague Gee Suss rescued him from obscurity.

If you would believe it, he was simply “bob” and although logs show him as coming from near Burwood, he chose to give a bogus email address (normally an instant ticket to the bin) and simply message us with

(link to a Youtube video of some 27 minutes’ duration)

i win

Not substantial by anybody’s standards, huh?

Gee Suss is a methodical chap, and watched the video. His dissection of it shows…

Even ‘Answers in Genesis’ a full on creationist website contains the above in the ‘Arguments Creationists should NEVER use’ list and a refutation of the claims by Ron Wyatt

Even the creationist idiot Kent Hovind knows he is a fraud, and Hovind is just a plain ignoramus himself.

Check out their report http://www.answersingenesis.org/creation/v14/i4/report.asp

… that “bob” has chosen a dud. At least he’s consistent.

So, “bob”, this one’s for you, and the Jesus who encourages you to do the online equivalent of placing burning bags of poo on doorsteps. I am sure he’s proud.

School student submission

Sent in by a reader, a great parody logo by some school students, as per the email “For context, big cru was a meeting of all the Christians at my school held every week. Its named after the crusader camps they hold every so often.”

Cheers “J”, thanks for passing this on! And solidarity from the crew at Jesus All About Lies with the struggles your having dealing with this stuff, we do understand and your not alone. It’s kids like yourself that is one of the reasons we think a critical review site such as this is so important. Whereas the christians will take offense I’m sure, we do understand that the statement and simply being able to make it, is very important to you, thanks for expressing yourself!

Postcards to say something: 011

Simple, beautiful and only a meanyhead would deny the existence of such a wonderful being! You cannot disprove this.

No, we’re talking about the unicorn.

(A nod of the goateed chin to our friend Mr C.T. Pot!)

Postcards to say something: 010

An old friend, Anonymous Trad, sent me this. Like the lovely folk songs Mr Trad has been providing for a number of years now, the origin of this picture is shrouded in mystery.

As you look, observe the layers of meaning: an artist’s work is stolen and made into an image by people working to make an image, and somebody has come along and added yet another layer of meaning to the image.

And as for the big chairs? Takes a lot of chutzpah.

Postcards to say something: 009

When I had a Jesus, he was looking out for the little guy, standing up against mercenary, heartless authoritarians.

Other people have a stern Jesus with a stick, making everybody do his bidding or else. Rich Jesus and Pharisee Jesus seem to be the Malibu Barbie of accessorised deities.

Part of the fun is that you can dress up Jesus just like your fantasies!

Postcards to say something 008

Thanks to reader Nerdiah for another fine submission. As the Big Sell enters Phase II, no doubt telly sets will be proclaiming “Jeebus has cancers”. Darling little cells: what an expression of divine love they turned out to be.

Still, keep your eyes on the hot chips and birds in pants: Jeebus only gets the good bits, and you can blame the rest on the Bad Fairy.

Sundays JesusAAL submitted picture

Ignoring the starving children, the Jesus All About Life campaign is focusing on cute pictures and claiming jesus gives answers, while really just ignoring them.

Here’s their Sunday contribution on FaceBook.

Maybe they should use ones like this?

Maybe caption this one? (Warning graphic images of dead children from natural disaster) You know, something about how jesus creates tsunamis that kills children then says ‘it’s to teach you to believe in me, so you can go to heaven’. What a bastard. This isn’t a laughing matter, I’d like to see exactly how this jesus is answering this.

I’ve actually asked on some christian sites about JAAL, and recommended a list of answers that christians really need to answer to gain some credibility, I’ll repost them here :

If you REALLY want to make a difference, and reach non-christians, you have to face and answer the massive evidence and critiques of your faith with actual ANSWERS. You don’t give any. You just state ‘Jesus is the answer’, with nothing to back it up. There is basically ‘he will make you feel better if you believe’.

You have to :

1/ Show logic and reason behind the existence of a supernatural entity other than pointing continually at your bible and using it’s phrases to point out positions that most all humans find totally obvious regardless as we are evolutionary socialistic beings.

2/ Show how your god is the one true god, amongst hundreds of others, and thousands that have gone before you.

3/ Show us the evidence of the claims for a young earth, and the ‘fact’ of creation that you claim is an alternative Theory (and look up how a scientific theory actually works) to the evolution of humans from a common ancestor to other life. Actually read up on what evolution actually is, that it is seperate from abiogenesis and cosmology, and approach the facts, not the straw man you put forward

4/ Stop trying to point at non-belief, and saying it is a belief (like not stamp collecting is a ‘hobby’) as it does not make sense to anyone but you.

5/ Explain why we have mountains of evidence that contradict the creationists claims, why the mass of evidence in radioactivity, tree rings, ice cores, corals, supernovas – from astronomy, biology, physics, geology, chemistry and archeology all combine and go against your faiths concepts.

6/ explain why your god has always existed, and the universe in some form, couldn’t. (you may want to actually read up on scientific concepts like singularities and bubble universes etc etc)

somehow I am pretty sure none of this will be answered, they’ll just keep on keeping on commoditising their jesus.

So what’s the answer? praying to Jesus? Or actually getting off your knees and doing something?

Postcards from our friends: 001

Thanks to our friends who contribute postcards and comments: here’s the first few in an ongoing series.

We promise they won’t jump all over your screen or choke the household bandwidth like the other guys. (Also, contains no hot chips!)

More to come, and a big welcome to Gee Suss’s brother Mo Suss, who’s joing the Legion editorial cadre.